After announcing my diagnosis of Aspergers, I received a wonderful comment from fellow blogger, Danny Bradfield, to remember that I am called to ministry and that the Aspergers doesn't distract from that.
He is right about that. But I am left with the question: what am I called to do?
I know I was called to be in ordained ministry. But I also know that I don't have the skills to be a solo pastor. I probably do well as an associate pastor with specific duties, but those jobs are few and far between. Chaplaincy? I don't think it helps to have an autistic chaplain.
So, what do I do? Where do I fit?
Yeah, I have thought about church planting, but since I haven't heard anything from anyone expressing interest, I can conclude that is not in the cards.
This week was the Festival of Homiletics in Minneapolis. I should have gone for at least one day of this event, but I didn't. I guess I felt a bit down on myself and felt that I didn't deserve to be there.
It's hard to explain and I don't think I can even put it into words right now. It's just that I don't always feel like any of this is real.
I hope at some point God gives me a clue as to where I can use the skills God has given me.